Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Four days without Da-da

William and I spent the last four days without "Da-da."

Every morning, he woke up looking for Da-da . . . in the bed, in the kitchen (those are the only places he could be). Finally he would look up at a picture on the wall and exclaim, "Da-da!" and smile. The first morning there were tears and we looked at all of the pictures of Da-da I have. We had to look at them often throughout the day. I didn't know if he would survive the weekend.

On Saturday, I had a couple of friends watch him so I could do a photo shoot. He handled that just fine although cried when they left. We went to the park later that afternoon and I noticed that he gravitated toward other dads at the park, even calling out "Da-da." I've heard of this before so I just said, "Yes, that is that little boy's daddy," and left it at that.

I had read a blog post about a mom who made her weekend without her husband special for her kids. They made brownies together and had a special mommy-me time. It was sweet. But in all honesty, every waking moment is mommy-me time for William. I'm always here. Its always us (okay, not always, but that is how I felt about it at the moment). But I decided to try it anyway. We made a fort, which he loved. We baked banana bread, which he liked making but refused to eat. I put a pizza in the oven to try to save my sanity and he took a couple of bites, but only of the crust. In the end, we had fun, but it was exhausting and not as fruitful as I would have hoped.

I did try to keep the apartment cleaned up a bit and do my normal chores, but some things had to wait. Without the support of my husband to help corral the boy and get things done I was exhausted by the end of day two. But I had already invited some girlfriends over so I just kept going -- vacuuming, cleaning, and combing my hair.

On Sunday, we went to church after the morning nap, keeping with our normal routine. I was glad to be in church and so glad William likes being in the nursery . . . even when he's the only one there. And afterwards we came home, had lunch and played for a bit before nap. But as is William's way, when momma needs a nap, that is the time he refuses to go to sleep. (btw, he woke up at 4:50 a.m. that morning. . .)

I tried snuggling with him for a few minutes, which was sweet and he laid still for 4 seconds. Then I downed a coke and we went to the park.

My goal for Sunday was to get to bed by 9 p.m. and it happened! I had to be ready for Monday, which was going to be much of the same as any other Monday except I wouldn't have help in the morning as I am accustomed to. Chris does a lot in the mornings before he leaves for work: preps my lunch/snack, occupies William so I can shower, read, or work, makes breakfast and cleans up afterwards.

Monday was fine, but I think that was only because I could count down the hours until Chris came home. Seriously, if he wasn't coming home that very evening, I don't think we would have survived. I was burnt out. I had saved our grocery run for that morning after I went into work, I just could not bring myself to do it on the weekend. William loves sitting in the shopping cart, so other than having to buy a few extra things (because he sticks them in his mouth) it goes well. It's the unloading the car, unpacking the groceries and putting everything away with toddler help that wiped me out. (Fun side note: William stacked all the cans on top of each other while I wasn't looking!)

Overall, the long weekend went as well as I could have hoped for. I knew I would be exhausted by the end of it, but I kept reminding myself that this was an important trip for Chris (visiting friends in NYC -- the trip has been postponed twice in two years).

When William woke up on Tuesday morning and saw Da-da was home, he could not have been happier, although he did look a little shocked at first.

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