Whole30: Day 2

Just a quick note to say that I successfully survived the day! Here's what I ate:

Breakfast: 3 eggs scrambled with onion, avocado and spinach
Snack: carrot sticks, apple slices and almonds
Lunch: spaghetti squash with beef ragu and salad
Snack: apple slices and almonds
Dinner: pork tenderloin, green beans and a sweet potato (it was all delicious)

I had a pretty low-energy day as I didn't sleep well the night before, but I did make it to a water aerobics class. I had been wanting to try it for a while but the schedule never fit with mine. Today, William's school was canceled and that freed me up to go! It was great. I'm sure I looked terrible and didn't do half of it right, but I had fun and felt good afterwards.

I took a nap today or laid down anyway - not sure if I truly slept but my body was a dead weight and I couldn't move when I intended to get up. That happens a lot for me, so not really diet related.

Chris decided to join me in the diet too! So far so good!

Just a quick note to say that I successfully survived the day! Here's what I ate:

Breakfast: 3 eggs scrambled with onion, avocado and spinach
Snack: carrot sticks, apple slices and almonds
Lunch: spaghetti squash with beef ragu and salad
Snack: apple slices and almonds
Dinner: pork tenderloin, green beans and a sweet potato (it was all delicious)

I had a pretty low-energy day as I didn't sleep well the night before, but I did make it to a water aerobics class. I had been wanting to try it for a while but the schedule never fit with mine. Today, William's school was canceled and that freed me up to go! It was great. I'm sure I looked terrible and didn't do half of it right, but I had fun and felt good afterwards.

I took a nap today or laid down anyway - not sure if I truly slept but my body was a dead weight and I couldn't move when I intended to get up. That happens a lot for me, so not really diet related.

Chris decided to join me in the diet too! So far so good!

For Health and Life

For a while now, I've been thinking about some changes I need to make in my life. My diet specifically. I've become aware of how the things I eat are actually effecting the way I feel (and look). I cannot be in denial any longer. I've realized that in the past six months, my metabolism as changed. It seemed to happen overnight, really. Suddenly I looked down and my shape had changed.

I had joined a gym a year ago and go fairly regularly. If the kids aren't sick and I can get there, I go. Basically two or three times a week. I haven't been able to go on the weekends, it just seems harder for some reason. (Schedule, fun things, chores, naps, etc.) But even with the gym, my eating habits were in charge of my health and the number on the scale never went down. Only up . . . and up.

I had seen friends post about Whole30 and my sister did it a while back. If you haven't heard about it, its basically a reset for your body--for 30 days you only eat whole, natural foods including vegetables, meat, some fruit and healthy fats. No additives, no sugar, no grains, no dairy. All of my very favorite things. I had cut out gluten in 2012 because I was told gluten is related to inflammation of which I was suffering greatly. I did it for over a year and it helped a lot. In 2016 I stayed away from dairy because I was trying to breast feed a dairy sensitive baby and my acne cleared up a lot. So I know the food that goes into my body matters. It makes a difference.

More recently I have noticed (and a friend also pointed out) how much of the kid's food I was eating. Just picking things off their plate or scarfing it down before washing dishes. Extra calories. It all adds up. And if they didn't add up to do damage, they were certainly wrecking my ability to go an hour without eating. I am being honest here. I found myself eating nearly all day long. My ability to judge if I was full or hungry was long gone.

And so was my energy. I haven't been sleeping all that well lately and waking up really tired. Napping helps in the moment but also keeps me up at night. And in general I would say my focus has been lacking . . . and when I lack focus I do a lot of Facebook feed scanning. Not how I want to spend my days.

So, all this is to say is that I am hoping to make changes. Today is Day 1 of my attempt to eat healthy, whole, natural foods and nothing else. (I celebrated this decision by eating two bagels, a cupcake and drinking two beers yesterday.)

My cart from this morning's grocery run: Full before I left the produce section. Success.

Day 1 Stats:

Breakfast: scrambled eggs with avocado 

Morning snack: banana and snap peas

Lunch: chicken breast and roasted green beans

Afternoon Snack: Almonds, apple slices and snap peas

Dinner: Spaghetti squash and homemade beef ragu

Except for breakfast I felt full after each meal/snack. I also drank a lot more water than I usually do. Definitely reached 8 cups! I also had a cup of tea at church (without honey). My cravings didn't really bother me today --I was feeling quite motivated to do well so maybe that helped. 

I don't know if I'll post everyday, but wanted to at least make it known that I had started! 

Day 2 awaits!

For a while now, I've been thinking about some changes I need to make in my life. My diet specifically. I've become aware of how the things I eat are actually effecting the way I feel (and look). I cannot be in denial any longer. I've realized that in the past six months, my metabolism as changed. It seemed to happen overnight, really. Suddenly I looked down and my shape had changed.

I had joined a gym a year ago and go fairly regularly. If the kids aren't sick and I can get there, I go. Basically two or three times a week. I haven't been able to go on the weekends, it just seems harder for some reason. (Schedule, fun things, chores, naps, etc.) But even with the gym, my eating habits were in charge of my health and the number on the scale never went down. Only up . . . and up.

I had seen friends post about Whole30 and my sister did it a while back. If you haven't heard about it, its basically a reset for your body--for 30 days you only eat whole, natural foods including vegetables, meat, some fruit and healthy fats. No additives, no sugar, no grains, no dairy. All of my very favorite things. I had cut out gluten in 2012 because I was told gluten is related to inflammation of which I was suffering greatly. I did it for over a year and it helped a lot. In 2016 I stayed away from dairy because I was trying to breast feed a dairy sensitive baby and my acne cleared up a lot. So I know the food that goes into my body matters. It makes a difference.

More recently I have noticed (and a friend also pointed out) how much of the kid's food I was eating. Just picking things off their plate or scarfing it down before washing dishes. Extra calories. It all adds up. And if they didn't add up to do damage, they were certainly wrecking my ability to go an hour without eating. I am being honest here. I found myself eating nearly all day long. My ability to judge if I was full or hungry was long gone.

And so was my energy. I haven't been sleeping all that well lately and waking up really tired. Napping helps in the moment but also keeps me up at night. And in general I would say my focus has been lacking . . . and when I lack focus I do a lot of Facebook feed scanning. Not how I want to spend my days.

So, all this is to say is that I am hoping to make changes. Today is Day 1 of my attempt to eat healthy, whole, natural foods and nothing else. (I celebrated this decision by eating two bagels, a cupcake and drinking two beers yesterday.)

My cart from this morning's grocery run: Full before I left the produce section. Success.

Day 1 Stats:

Breakfast: scrambled eggs with avocado 

Morning snack: banana and snap peas

Lunch: chicken breast and roasted green beans

Afternoon Snack: Almonds, apple slices and snap peas

Dinner: Spaghetti squash and homemade beef ragu

Except for breakfast I felt full after each meal/snack. I also drank a lot more water than I usually do. Definitely reached 8 cups! I also had a cup of tea at church (without honey). My cravings didn't really bother me today --I was feeling quite motivated to do well so maybe that helped. 

I don't know if I'll post everyday, but wanted to at least make it known that I had started! 

Day 2 awaits!

A Wrinkle In Time

Chris has told me before that he really liked reading A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle and he has even read the graphic novel to William already . . . like a year ago. I had over heard bits and pieces but never really followed it. But when one of the women in my bookclub mentioned it was her favorite book, I decided I should give it a read.

I just finished it this morning and I haven't really been able to process the deeper meaning behind the symbolism, but I did really like it. And it was a lot easier to get into than I had expected. I do hope to spend some time thinking it all through and perhaps I'll read it again.

I typically don't read things that might be categorized as Science Fiction or Fantasy, but I found the science-y bits didn't overwhelm me or distract me from the story. And as I try to describe to you the plot of the story and all it contains, I am at a loss for words. It is other-worldly, and a mystery to be solved, and allegorical of dark forces that need to be fought.

Have you read it? What did you think?

Chris has told me before that he really liked reading A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle and he has even read the graphic novel to William already . . . like a year ago. I had over heard bits and pieces but never really followed it. But when one of the women in my bookclub mentioned it was her favorite book, I decided I should give it a read.

I just finished it this morning and I haven't really been able to process the deeper meaning behind the symbolism, but I did really like it. And it was a lot easier to get into than I had expected. I do hope to spend some time thinking it all through and perhaps I'll read it again.

I typically don't read things that might be categorized as Science Fiction or Fantasy, but I found the science-y bits didn't overwhelm me or distract me from the story. And as I try to describe to you the plot of the story and all it contains, I am at a loss for words. It is other-worldly, and a mystery to be solved, and allegorical of dark forces that need to be fought.

Have you read it? What did you think?

Bookclub: Watch Me Disappear

This month, we read Watch Me Disappear by Janelle Brown. Its a novel that reminded us a lot of Gone Girl, but a little less intense/dark.  An easy read, and very enjoyable I think; it also took place in the Bay Area which allowed it to feel a little like I was hearing the story from a friend.

A woman with a past many do not know leaves behind a workaholic husband and a teenage daughter. Did she die? Did she choose to abandon them or did something really terrible happen to her and she needs help? We get to experience the heartbreak and pain this missing woman leaves behind and enter into their confusion as facts are brought out in the open.

It's a mystery and a mild thrill to uncover what really happened. But I can't tell you what that is!

This month, we read Watch Me Disappear by Janelle Brown. Its a novel that reminded us a lot of Gone Girl, but a little less intense/dark.  An easy read, and very enjoyable I think; it also took place in the Bay Area which allowed it to feel a little like I was hearing the story from a friend.

A woman with a past many do not know leaves behind a workaholic husband and a teenage daughter. Did she die? Did she choose to abandon them or did something really terrible happen to her and she needs help? We get to experience the heartbreak and pain this missing woman leaves behind and enter into their confusion as facts are brought out in the open.

It's a mystery and a mild thrill to uncover what really happened. But I can't tell you what that is!

Preschooler: The Four and a Half Year Old

Ever since William turned four in October he has been telling people that he is almost four and a half and the day finally came when he was right. April 1, this year Easter, was his half birthday!

He really enjoyed Easter this year. We attempted to do the Resurrection Eggs this year but Stephen kept losing the pieces/playing with them. But we did keep up with a Bible reading every day over the past week. We died eggs a few times with friends and then on Sunday, William sang during the church service with the other kids in Sunday School. He is quite a little performer!

We are amazed at who our son is becoming. Thoughtful, sensitive, and pretty smart. At 4 1/2 years old he is showing an interest in reading and progressing quickly through our step-by-step early reader books. He still loves being read to, which we do often through out every day. We recently discovered "The Magic Treehouse" series in audiobook and paperback form, he loves them both. When we are in the car, he prefers to listen to a book or story rather than music or the radio.

He still loves playing "garbage truck" with Stephen. They play all sorts of truck-themed play together. He still enjoys when an adult plays with him too, especially when Stephen isn't available.

William has started to do more free-hand drawing. I think watching his little brother draw all over the place has been helpful in inspiring him to do it more too. His last drawing was quite impressive with an ocean scene -- a boat, a whale, little fish and a turtle. He also drew a 3 foot giraffe on our large format paper a few weeks ago!

He has also started to comprehend the idea of coloring books and staying in the lines more (instead of scribbling all over the page). He isn't too interested in writing letters yet, but that will come eventually. His overall pen control has improved a ton in the past 6 months.

We just registered William to attend a Transitional Kindergarten program next fall (August 20 technically). He did a walk through of the classroom and was pretty excited. He was telling the principle of the early childhood education center all about it. This school is just a preschool and TK program, not a full on elementary school so we will be doing just one year at this facility before finding another K-5 school to join. It will be nice to stay in a smaller building/environment for now before moving on to a school with 400+ kids!

Another big boy step is ditching the diapers! He has been diaper free for day-time for over two years but as of early March, he has been sleeping without them too! We took it slow and had lots of incentives and he did it! I'm so proud!

We love our "big guy" and are excited for what the next 6 months (and beyond) hold for him.

Ever since William turned four in October he has been telling people that he is almost four and a half and the day finally came when he was right. April 1, this year Easter, was his half birthday!

He really enjoyed Easter this year. We attempted to do the Resurrection Eggs this year but Stephen kept losing the pieces/playing with them. But we did keep up with a Bible reading every day over the past week. We died eggs a few times with friends and then on Sunday, William sang during the church service with the other kids in Sunday School. He is quite a little performer!

We are amazed at who our son is becoming. Thoughtful, sensitive, and pretty smart. At 4 1/2 years old he is showing an interest in reading and progressing quickly through our step-by-step early reader books. He still loves being read to, which we do often through out every day. We recently discovered "The Magic Treehouse" series in audiobook and paperback form, he loves them both. When we are in the car, he prefers to listen to a book or story rather than music or the radio.

He still loves playing "garbage truck" with Stephen. They play all sorts of truck-themed play together. He still enjoys when an adult plays with him too, especially when Stephen isn't available.

William has started to do more free-hand drawing. I think watching his little brother draw all over the place has been helpful in inspiring him to do it more too. His last drawing was quite impressive with an ocean scene -- a boat, a whale, little fish and a turtle. He also drew a 3 foot giraffe on our large format paper a few weeks ago!

He has also started to comprehend the idea of coloring books and staying in the lines more (instead of scribbling all over the page). He isn't too interested in writing letters yet, but that will come eventually. His overall pen control has improved a ton in the past 6 months.

We just registered William to attend a Transitional Kindergarten program next fall (August 20 technically). He did a walk through of the classroom and was pretty excited. He was telling the principle of the early childhood education center all about it. This school is just a preschool and TK program, not a full on elementary school so we will be doing just one year at this facility before finding another K-5 school to join. It will be nice to stay in a smaller building/environment for now before moving on to a school with 400+ kids!

Another big boy step is ditching the diapers! He has been diaper free for day-time for over two years but as of early March, he has been sleeping without them too! We took it slow and had lots of incentives and he did it! I'm so proud!

We love our "big guy" and are excited for what the next 6 months (and beyond) hold for him.

March Madness

I don't really know why March felt so disjointed for me. I don't usually find an entire month to be a challenge to get through, but this one was. There was one event that I wasn't especially excited about (for myself, I was excited for Chris) which was his six day vacation with his men's group. It sounded like a big adventure and a lot of fun - camping in the Mojave dessert, Death Valley, seeing Joshua Tree and the Red Rocks. I held down the fort with the boys and kept up with our routines as much as possible. It all went fine and we all survived, it was a long week and I was a little anxious about it before it started. I remembered a friend of mine saying that when her husband traveled, she didn't do a countdown because it made the days go so slow, I took her advice and tried to make each day it's own and plan something active/fun and it helped a lot.

But there were also two unexpected funerals to attend. The first was my Aunt Carol's who passed away in mid-February. Her service was in Minneapolis on March 2. Chris stayed home with the boys so I could attend and focus on being with my family which I really appreciated and needed. I was gone a total of 4 days. I was so glad to go but it wasn't an easy time.

The second was Chris's grandfather, Beryl Babiak. He passed away on March 23 and Chris flew to Oklahoma on March 28 to be with his family for the funeral. He was away for just one night (two full days). I'm thankful he was able to go and sad that we hadn't been able to make it to OK for a visit prior to his passing.

In the middle of it all was a treat: Chris's mom came to visit us for 4 days! One-on-one time with Mom B. is always treasured but this weekend turned out to be a busy one and I felt a little more preoccupied than I would have normally. Focusing on my activities instead of getting to focus on her visit was hard, but required. The boys still got to spend some great time with her and she even got to witness William's swimming lesson which was fun.

So, needless to say, March was busy. I think the really hard part for me comes when Chris and I don't get our normal weeknights together. Typically we have dinner together every night and we spend a majority of our evening playing games, watching TV, reading or working in a shared space. This month we had 11 evenings where we were both home and available. Every Wednesday we have a small group that gathers at our home so although we are together and it's awesome, I can't say we were "together" if that makes any sense. All the other days of the month someone was traveling! That's just crazy for our family--for our marriage.

And if you are familiar with stepping away from your routines for any length of time, you know that coming home and jumping right back in is really hard; I know that Chris really struggled this month with feeling behind in a lot of areas . . . mostly my "Honey-Do List." He must be exhausted! And I felt more lonely and a little more depressed with the separation.

As for the boys, they struggled too. William's pre-K class schedule was sort of crazy this month -- one session ended and a new one began with a break in between and then a week later was Spring Break for the school district so he was off again. They both missed dad a ton -- especially his second trip for the funeral. They realized what it meant for him to fly away and it was so soon after he returned from his camping trip.

I'm relieved March is over. It was a hard month emotionally and it took it's toll on our relationships. I'm hopeful that April -- beginning with Resurrection Sunday -- will be much brighter, happier and include a few more date nights.

How do you cope when your spouse travels? What are your challenges?

I don't really know why March felt so disjointed for me. I don't usually find an entire month to be a challenge to get through, but this one was. There was one event that I wasn't especially excited about (for myself, I was excited for Chris) which was his six day vacation with his men's group. It sounded like a big adventure and a lot of fun - camping in the Mojave dessert, Death Valley, seeing Joshua Tree and the Red Rocks. I held down the fort with the boys and kept up with our routines as much as possible. It all went fine and we all survived, it was a long week and I was a little anxious about it before it started. I remembered a friend of mine saying that when her husband traveled, she didn't do a countdown because it made the days go so slow, I took her advice and tried to make each day it's own and plan something active/fun and it helped a lot.

But there were also two unexpected funerals to attend. The first was my Aunt Carol's who passed away in mid-February. Her service was in Minneapolis on March 2. Chris stayed home with the boys so I could attend and focus on being with my family which I really appreciated and needed. I was gone a total of 4 days. I was so glad to go but it wasn't an easy time.

The second was Chris's grandfather, Beryl Babiak. He passed away on March 23 and Chris flew to Oklahoma on March 28 to be with his family for the funeral. He was away for just one night (two full days). I'm thankful he was able to go and sad that we hadn't been able to make it to OK for a visit prior to his passing.

In the middle of it all was a treat: Chris's mom came to visit us for 4 days! One-on-one time with Mom B. is always treasured but this weekend turned out to be a busy one and I felt a little more preoccupied than I would have normally. Focusing on my activities instead of getting to focus on her visit was hard, but required. The boys still got to spend some great time with her and she even got to witness William's swimming lesson which was fun.

So, needless to say, March was busy. I think the really hard part for me comes when Chris and I don't get our normal weeknights together. Typically we have dinner together every night and we spend a majority of our evening playing games, watching TV, reading or working in a shared space. This month we had 11 evenings where we were both home and available. Every Wednesday we have a small group that gathers at our home so although we are together and it's awesome, I can't say we were "together" if that makes any sense. All the other days of the month someone was traveling! That's just crazy for our family--for our marriage.

And if you are familiar with stepping away from your routines for any length of time, you know that coming home and jumping right back in is really hard; I know that Chris really struggled this month with feeling behind in a lot of areas . . . mostly my "Honey-Do List." He must be exhausted! And I felt more lonely and a little more depressed with the separation.

As for the boys, they struggled too. William's pre-K class schedule was sort of crazy this month -- one session ended and a new one began with a break in between and then a week later was Spring Break for the school district so he was off again. They both missed dad a ton -- especially his second trip for the funeral. They realized what it meant for him to fly away and it was so soon after he returned from his camping trip.

I'm relieved March is over. It was a hard month emotionally and it took it's toll on our relationships. I'm hopeful that April -- beginning with Resurrection Sunday -- will be much brighter, happier and include a few more date nights.

How do you cope when your spouse travels? What are your challenges?