A while back I blogged about three men that were taking big risks to live their dreams. You can read it here if you missed it. At the bottom of the post I quickly mentioned there was a fourth guy with a similar story but we hadn't seen the outcome to our prayers just yet. Well, yesterday we got the news.
And it wasn't the news we were hoping for. In case you didn't know, the 4th man was my husband, Chris. I'll do my best to share the details, but mostly, I just needed a place to process this devastating news.
In October of 2009, three months after we were married, Chris voiced his dream job out loud. I had asked where he would work if he could work anywhere. His response was "Pixar." So, we packed up and moved to the Bay Area so we could pursue that career. If you've read my blog at all, you know that story wasn't a short one or an easy one.
Throughout our time in California, Chris has applied to a number of jobs with this company; he's even had a few contacts to network with (most of which were not helpful). But one was very helpful and really took the time to discuss his resume, their culture, and the options. They always say it's not what you know but who you know and this felt like one of those situations. Finally, we knew someone!
And then, months later, there was an opening! And a call back! And then an interview! We had never come so close! It was hard not to get our hopes up, but Chris was always cautious. I, on the other hand, was on cloud nine. I felt like this had to be from the Lord. After all, we had waited for so long!
And then a phone call. Sorry, Sir, this one is not meant for you. . . but another department wants to meet you. What? That's even better (because the first gig was not all that great). Now I'm really thinking God is in this; he's been giving two chances to get his foot in the door!
So, he goes to another interview and really connects well with one of the managers. And weeks go by. And then on Tuesday, we get the call. Sorry, Sir, we're going with another candidate.
Hope dashed, God questioned, and tears shed.
I know that God is with us, that he loves us, and wants to bless us. I know that he knows my husband's greatest desires. And I have to trust that this happened for a reason. But it seems so crazy that this didn't work out. Why wasn't this it?
And now we question, "Now what?" If moving here was to go after this job, then what do we do when the door closes? Sure, there could be another one. But what if there isn't. How long are we to wait?
Answering these questions will not be easy. We will be in much prayer; it's important that we strain to hear God in this moment (however long it lasts) and follow what he tell us. I don't think we were wrong to move here; both of us have loved the city, our friends, our lives. God will lead us forward. We will continue to trust that he has a plan, and that it's a good one!